About Me


About Me
I can't lie.  Everything I say is the honest truth and you can trust that every thing I say I mean.  I am putting this in writing here, as I have no friends left. 
People just hate the truth don't they?

Ok.  About me.  Here goes.

Quite a while ago, I was actually born!  That is a fact.

I was an odd kid and spent most of my time hanging onto my older sister by her ankles and she would drag me around with her.  She was a trooper.  That is a fact.

I spent most of my time at school flicking notes to other kids, who upon reading would often laugh.  Some however just grassed me up for being a twat.  That is a fact.

I ran away and joined the Army shortly after leaving school.  that is a fact.  I had tried to run away with the circus,  but at the interview, they said they had to many clowns.  I was applying to be a lion tamer.  That is a joke, and that's a fact.


The best job I ever had, was a to lie on the sofa all day and watch movies.  It was my own business and I was the best woman for the job. That is a fact.

My modelling career began after I was told I would look good on canvas.  I was interviewed and had test shots done at a local  boxing ring.  After being punched in the head I lay down.  They were right, I got a fantastic photo of myself on the canvas.  That is party a fact, and partly a joke.  

I will add more to this so check back.  See you or not.  That is a fact.